Well Divlettes, guess who’s back yet again. Me.
I remember my previous post. I was excited about relaunching Resurrected Diva and finally being able to start my dream, sharing what I know with the universe. I had a business idea and I was ready to share it with the world. I was getting excited for Pagan Picnic and all the opportunity that it brought.
And then life happened.
My mom had a stroke. This was the worst one she’s ever had. This one needed months of physical, occupational, and speech therapy. I came out of this with a whole range of feelings. I was resentful at first because for months, my mom just decided to stop taking her medication. She believed that the doctors were prescribing medicine that she didn’t need. Understandable. Her reason for not talking to the doctor, not quite so understandable. My only guess is that she felt that she wasn’t getting the care she thought she needed and feared that other doctors would treat her the same way. After talking with her for a while, I eventually dropped the topic because I realized that this is an adult she has the free will to make her own decisions, even if those decisions ultimately harm her.
As her time of her at the stroke rehabilitation facilities went on, I had a major revelation. Here is a woman, who ultimately brought change into her life, also brought change into my life as well. I can’t change the past. I feel like I did the best I could to help her see what the right decision was. I wonder, “How many times did my mother had to stand back and watch me make the wrong decisions, and how many times did she choose to forgive me”? Numerous times.
“How many times did I have to stand back and watch my mom make the wrong decision, and how many times do I need to choose to forgive my mom”? Once, if I choose to.
I chose to move past my anger.
I chose this decision because I’d like to continue my loving relationship with my mom.
I chose this decision because I do not want to live in bondage to hate, anger, and strife.
I chose this decision because I do not want to live in the past.
I chose this decision because I choose to move past a situation that at this point, can’t be changed.
As the months of therapy went by, I noticed that someone else chose a different path. They chose to follow everything that I turned away. That has caused tension, drama, and strife throughout the household. While it’s not my place to tell someone how to feel, I feel it’s my duty to stand up for myself and others especially when those feelings turn into reasons for being mean. I wish I could offer this individual advice on how to turn their pain into beauty, but they have made their final decision. I have to honor that. That is where my boundaries end and theirs begins. They have life lessons to learn as time goes on.
What is my takeaway lesson for this post? Life doesn’t always go as planned. People can throw a curveball in while you’re trying to hit a home run. Even if you strike out, there’s always another chance to get up at bat. You can choose to get better or get bitter.
Getting back to my title, what does it mean that I started a new year today as I write this? What does that mean for me and what does that mean for you? It means that for me, I’m returning back to what I was going to do in March 2018. I wanted to blog more and share what services I have with you. It means that in addition to the content on Facebook, I’ll also share the daily tarot readings on Instagram and matching inspirational quotes on Twitter. There are a lot of other things coming down the bend. Get ready because I’m ready to hit a home run!